Monday, June 08, 2009


Wow, finally a bike related post. So, I've been in a funk. I haven't been riding much lately, and the rides I've been on, have been lousy. I'm usually rushed, thinking about getting home to take care of E, or clean, mow the lawn, etc. I've let the rut get deep. Today K gave me the best gift I've had in a while.... time, time to myself. Time to ride, to clear the cob webs, to take as long as I wanted. Initially I wasn't going to go, K woke me up early because she thought she heard E fooling around (6:45), but E was sound asleep in her room. I'm also super light sensitive, so once the daylight hit my eyes I was up. Then the dogs wanted breakfast, so my day began. E woke up @ 8:00, K was up half an hour later, and wanted to work out on the elliptical. Needless to say it was ~ 10:00 before I was gathering my things to head out to Madrone, I knew it would be hot, but I didn't care. I just have to get it out of my head and deal with it. Until we move to another part of the country this is my fate.

To give you some sense of scale, the rocks in the middle are not normally visible. The banks on either side are also usually about 2/3 covered in wet stuff.

The lake @ Madrone is lower than I've ever seen it. The trail was in great shape, I only wish I were. I'm back to riding fixed and some fairly simple stuff rocked me, but I didn't give up, even sessioned a few things until I owned them. I don't know what time I got out there, it didn't matter. I took my sweet time, as I didn't have to be anywhere. It was wonderful for my mind, body, and soul. I really must take the time to make time for myself and express that I need this time weekly. I honestly can't remember the last time I had a free day to do as I pleased. I also came to the conclusion that I've been letting negativity toxify me. At first it's little stupid things that annoy me, then bigger things (like having an offer letter and finding out the offer is being withdrawn), and then it becomes all consuming. I need to just let go of these things before they poison me any further. Need to keep focus, and work on the things in my life I can make better. So, note to self, let it go man. Let it all go and you'll be a better person for it. Being on the bike is not my addiction or drug, it is my detox, it is exactly what the Dr. ordered.


1 comment:

erin said...